I was adopted as an infant.
I have been asked my whole life if I will/have I yet/ aren't I interested in finding my "real" family. Just like so many other things in life, people not knowing what to say end up saying something dumb. Like:
Don't you want someone/family to look like you? I have 3 children that I couldn't deny even if I tried. They all look just like me. Rediculous.
What about medical history, shouldn't you know? I have a Type 1 Diabetic son. If it is in the family history, knowing that would not have stopped him developing it.
I'm sure you feel incomplete. Really? I have no other family. I know no other family. How can you miss something you know nothing of?
What does it feel like? WHA??? I know what the expected answer is. I always said I don't know anything else and I don't really think about it that often. I know for many this was a let down. Not angsty enough.
Frequently when I was young I would tell people at school I was adopted 'cause, honestly, it does have a good shock value attached to it when you are in 6th grade. No one believed me. I suppose that is because I wasn't in some constant state of tortured existential identity crisis or perhaps wasn't enough like an After School Special (wow, I am old) or didn't resemble a Lifetime movie enough to believe me. There is an image of what adopted kids are supposed to be like and I guess I just didn't fit it.
Don't get me wrong. I wondered who they were and what they were like. I know next to nothing about them. I know I was born in Texas. I was adopted out of Christian Homes. I do have some very general physical descriptions. I think I must look a lot like my father. Physical descriptions are virtually useless unless I have some familial doppelganger out there somewhere.
So why now? I knew I never wanted to pursue this for the wrong reason or just to satisfy some morbid curiosity, because you just don't know what is on the other side. I have known people that have had very good experiences locating a birth family and I have also known those with terrible ones. I guess having my own children gives me greater understanding of what sort of decision that must have been. I think losing my dad younger than many people do made me want them to see the children I had before they died. I was always liked that Dad would get down in the floor with my kids when they were little and play with them. These people did not get that chance but perhaps seeing them as the young men they are now.....
So I am using this as a possible vehicle to locate the couple that gave me up for adoption. I have virtually nothing to go on other than my birthplace. So that is where I will start.
I am an adopted Texan.
